24 Obscure Kinks and Fetishes of Gay Men

Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.

He tells me to unbuckle my belt and slide my pants down. “Bend over, son.” I obey.

“Christ received 39 lashes. We’ll start you at 13. Count them out, one by one. If you miss one, we start over.” He starts to spank me with his hand — hard. I count them. “One.” Spank. “Two.” Spank.“Three.” I feel my ass heating up, the sting of each blow. I picture my skin reddening beneath his hand in the dim light of the church.

This may strike an uneasy chord with some folks — the intersection of desire and faith usually does — but it’s a common role-play scenario for folks with fetishes for religious imagery and ritual. This and other lesser-known fetishes don’t get talked about enough. Shame keeps them behind closed doors.

Opinions among sociologists differ over at which point on our evolutionary timeline we learned to wield shame as such a powerful tool. No one denies the potency of shame in politics, religion, economics, and every social institution you can think of. We feel shame the strongest in our sex lives. Most of us grow up believing that desire operates according to certain triggers and rules — that arousal is formulaic and simple — and those those whose interests fall outside these boundaries are “abnormal” and “wrong.”

Browse these 24 lesser-known fetishes that are wrong in all the right ways. See anything you like?

A word of warning from Alex Cheves.

My name is Alexander Cheves, and I am known by friends in the kink and leather community as Beastly. I am a sex-positive writer and blogger. The views in this slideshow do not reflect those of The Advocate and are based solely off of my own experiences. Like everything I write, the intent of this piece is to break down the stigmas surrounding the sex lives of gay men.

Those who are sensitive to frank discussions about sex are invited to click elsewhere, but consider this: If you are outraged by content that address sex openly and honestly, I invite you to examine this outrage and ask yourself whether it should instead be directed at those who oppress us by policing our sexuality.

For all others, enjoy the slideshow. And feel free to leave your own suggestions of sex and dating topics in the comments.

1. The human furniture fetish.

Those of us in the world of heavy bondage are probably familiar with human furniture — an extreme form of bondage and sexual objectification in which a submissive is turned into a chair, table, cabinet, urinal, or some other piece of furniture.

It’s not easy to do, and requires a skilled bondage top and bottom. Bottoms are typically required to hold position for long periods of time and are often gagged. As always, the kink safety mantras SSC and RACK — “safe, sane, and consensual” and/or “risk aware consensual kink” — apply here.

2. Sexual attraction to trees.

Tree-hugging jokes are obvious, but these folks may do more than hug. Dendrophilia is sexual attraction to trees. Some dendrophiles on the internet say they seek out certain features of certain trees, like anus or vagina-esque holes. Just watch out for splinters!

3. Arousal from dipping your genitals in liquid.

Liquidophilia is arousal from getting your dick wet — in water or some other liquid. I suggest a trip to the beach.

4. The vomit fetish.

You know we fetishize everything that comes out of the human body, from semen to piss to tears, so you knew it was coming: the vomit fetish. Emetophilia is arousal from watching people lose their lunch.

5. Fetish for religious iconography.

Thanks to our old companion shame, religious iconography is filled with sexual tension. Religion is intimately intertwined with our sex lives. Most of us are taught from a young age what we can and cannot do with our bodies by parents who cite this or that religious practice as the foundation for these “rules.”

When we discover and accept our sexual selves and break free from these messages — when we learn to sift between the good lessons (don’t rape) and bad ones (don’t masturbate) — religious imagery and overtones can take on an erotic feel, and often do. This is more common than you might think.

Go to any fetish convention and you will see people in rubber nun habits, priests with no pants on, and people cuffed and whipped on a St. Andrew’s Cross — a staple piece of bondage furniture for any BDSM connoisseur.